leggings: Marimekko, top: second hand, shoes: UP

When you’re a long-time broke babe, you know that as soon as you have some form of money you need to sit on it like an anxious mama hen brooding on her eggs. But you haven’t been able to breathe for so long, enduring suffocation by money-related anxiety and feelings of intense inferiority because to be A Person is to have Money, that’s what everyone keeps telling you. To be a person is to consume. To be alive is to treat yourself to something you enjoy. No matter what, this is what you feel, you know intellectually that this is false, but you can’t shake the innate feeling of being a worthless lump of space if you can’t ever have nice things. I know intellectually I don’t actually need things, but to feel it is an entirely different thing. So I treated myself to what might be my last Marimekko sale item because my secret haunt has seemingly stopped stocking Marimekko. I treated myself because I am cute and had a little money I shouldn’t have spent. I treated myself because broke people deserve nice things too. It makes me feel worthy living and breathing and that’s fucked up but that’s capitalism for you, I guess. It’s fucked up but I can’t shake this feeling and I might not ever. But that’s okay, I am someone who has intense feelings about cuteness, clothing and various aesthetics, so I deserve to own this. But also, don’t I just look superhot? (Yes.)